Music Never Lets Me Down

“The expectation in Washington is that ‘We can kick you around, and you are still going to give us money,’ ” said a top official at a major Wall Street firm, speaking on the condition of anonymity for fear of alienating the White House. “We are not going to play that game anymore.”

- a top official at a major Wall Street firm, talking about Washington’s attitude toward Wall Street, apparently without any sense of irony

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/08/us/politics/08lobby.html?hp

Last time I checked, the bailout was aimed at banks that engaged in brazenly risky behavior and then took taxpayer dollars to keep their businesses afloat.  Many of them then turned those taxpayer dollars into massive executive bonuses - with the assertion that they were necessary to retain their most talented employees.

I don’t know about you, but I feel like the phrase “We can kick you around, and you are still going to give us money” has been the tone from one side of the national conversation since roughly September of 2008, but it hasn’t been Washington uttering that phrase, it’s been Gordon Gekko.

Hi all.  It’s been some time since my last post (to put this in perspective, my last post was about Surrogates, which was in theaters at the time - it is now out on Blu-ray).  But I have been hard at work.  I’m making music for you all to enjoy.

The next record is very far along in its formation.  It will have ten songs.  The words are written.  The drums are recorded.  The bass guitar and keyboards sound great.  The guitars are mostly reasonable - there are some solos and lead parts that I need to do, like, again.  And the vocals are about 50% complete.   I swear, this thing is moving.  As proof - here are song titles (in order):

Watch your mouth
Mystery cut
You better look at me when I’m talking to you
The city smells like fire
Weather in Memphis
Weather the whether
Twenty-nine ninety-two
Impeach
Your song don’t mean a thing to me
I’m sick of New York

What’s been the hold-up, you ask? Well, I have many valid excuses that are very believable and not at all rationalizations:

My brother got married
I moved
I had to buy things
My boss was very serious and needed something
Football
The Oscar nominations came out
I was hungry
I got sick
My foot hurts

So as you can see, I am bombarded by all sorts of things that normal people don’t have to deal with. Ah, the life of an office worker posing as a musician. Sometimes it’s easy to forget why you do what you do. But I’ve had many moments of clarity over the past 2-3 months and am back in the recording saddle. I even have a potential surprise that I am very excited about but do not want to sabotage by announcing too quickly.

That’s right, I cliffhangered you.

In other news, my girl and I went to a concert a couple of weeks ago. It was a Haiti benefit concert featuring basically every band I’ve ever liked (Walkmen, Wrens, Ted Leo, A.C. Newman) and several artists that I didn’t know I liked (Here We Go Magic, Sondre Lerche, Nicole Atkins, Lauren Ambrose & the Leisure Class, Fun) but do now. And Jim Gaffigan told a series of jokes about whales (hilarious) and Jimmy Fallon recycled his Neil Young/Fresh Prince mashup (A+ for effort), and all the proceeds went to charity, so I had a delightful time.

Wrens casually and gracefully kick you in the face:

I felt like I got far more than I bargained for - it’s one thing to support an absolutely necessary cause, another to be able to see several of my favorite groups (including my favorite), but even more delightful that I was able to find a bunch of new things that I didn’t even expect to like. I’m not nearly as well-informed as I was when I was in college (and worked for a radio station and constantly lost at oneupsmanship olympiads, otherwise known as hipster parties), so finding new things is a little rarer at this point and a little sweeter too.

What about you? Any cool stuff that you just fell into or stumbled upon and found that you unexpectedly really enjoyed it?

On this most sacred of holidays (Super Bowl Eve), I hope everyone’s staying warm and out of the Snowmageddon (hilarious term - I’m angry I didn’t coin it).

Should I be weirded out regarding the creepy similarities between the Surrogates ad campaign and the new GAP “Born to Fit” ad campaign?  These pictures aren’t the best representations of the similarities, but both campaigns are predicated on beautiful people in reclined positions.  In one ad they are wearing jeans, in the other they are sexy, but probably dangerous (or something) cyborgs.  Or maybe I’m mistaken - perhaps they are cyborgs in both.

This is likely a bit of a stretch, but walking down the street today and seeing both ads, I thought they seemed somewhat aesthetically related, albeit unintentionally.

“Think about the alternative: another crime drama, another hospital drama,” Mr. Farella said. “We like things that are different, so we can sit in front of clients and say, ‘Let me tell you what I’m doing differently this year than last year.’ ”  - an advertising exec, discussing how putting Jay Leno on at 10 pm on weeknights is “different”

How does moving a guy who has been on the same late night TV show for 17 years up by one hour earn you the right to claim that you’re doing something “differently?”

That’s like me saying, “I’m re-releasing a record I’ve already made, but I’m putting the tracks in a different order, so it’s a totally different experience.”

Dan and Kathryn are having a party this weekend at Barnaby’s in an effort to do some good in this world.  Go there.

Additional info can be found here and here.

And because you’re being so good, I’ll post this bedroom version of a song I’m working on that’s going to be awesome.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Do-goodering, Barnaby’s, Phillies, and the overwhelming anticipation for my next record.  What more could you ask for?

I’ve been around a lot of panic recently.  Many people seem eager, almost glad, to be whipped into a frenzy, nervous about anything that may go wrong, might become a problem.  Whatever these people don’t know immediately, they fear, and the resultant emotional state is panic.

I have decided, for my own life, that panic simply won’t do.  It’s an exremely unpleasant state, and I’m not convinced you get anything accomplished that you couldn’t do in a calm and relaxed state.   I have heard the argument that panicking illustrates that you care, and that others will appreciate the amount of seriousness you exhibit when an important task or problem presents itself.

However, I reject this notion.  Only an emotionally needy person would demand that others react to situations in this way, would insist that a level of suffering is necessary to appreciate the urgency of something.

So,that said, I am going to establish the rules for the Legitimate Reasons to Panic:

1) You or a loved one is facing imminent and immediate death or injury, and the cause of this physical harm is something that you can trace to a concrete physical threat within a five-mile radius and can predict that the harm will occur at a time within the next 48 hours.  This includes car crashes, psycho killers, stampedes, fires, natural disasters, a gun being pointed at you, etc.  Notice how long-term illnesses with vague expiration dates are not included in this item.

2) You or your household’s livelihood is taken away unexpectedly and the lack of purchasing power presents such drastic immediate difficulties so as to potentially bring about #1 (inability to buy food causing starvation, inability to afford home leads to homelessness, etc.).

3) Your child or a relatively defenseless person in your care is lost or has been taken away unexpectedly.  While #1 in this situation is not assured, the missing person’s inability to defend himself from whatever ills are out there makes the situation particularly dire, and the unknown nature of the threat combined with the fact that the potential victim does not have the resources to combat most assailants, justifies panic.

And really, I think all situations can either be reduced to one of these three scenarios or is otherwise not panic-worthy.

Things that are not panic-worthy (so long as they don’t lead to any of the above):

Loss of money, embarrassment, missing a plane, difficulties at work, the notion that you might be sick when you don’t have an official diagnosis from a medical professional, getting lost, feeling overwhelmed, etc.  All of these things can be overcome or at least endured if you take a deep breath and remember that you are not experiencing #1, #2, or #3.

So lighten up, everybody (myself included), life isn’t so bad.

I have stumbled upon a trade for the Sixers that I think works for all parties involved and helps with the Sixers’ dreadful 3-point shooting problem.  Please see the below image which I yanked from ESPN’s trade machine:

Somebody, somehow, please inform the front offices of Philadelphia, Chicago, Charlotte, and Minnesota that this trade is something that would help all of them.

As a long-suffering Philadelphia 76ers fan (bordering on perhaps delusional), I believe that this team is a player or two away from making some playoff noise, and those two players needn’t be marquee stars - they just need to be able to space the floor and improve the 76ers’ league-worst 3-point shooting.  This trade does that, and gives other teams some things they need in the process.

Minnesota: They have already put Randy Foye at SG and have poor Al Jefferson and some corpses playing C.  This will give them a true center and allow big Al to work at his natural position at PF.  The problem will be the glut of forwards that remain (Carney, Brewer, Love, Smith, Madsen, Cardinal, Love, Gomes), but they have that problem anyway with or without this trade, and this doesn’t ADD to the problem (it should definitely help Jefferson play more in-position).

Charlotte: A paper swap.  Coach Larry Brown hates Sean May anyway, and while Rashad McCants is terrible, he costs less than May and also comes off the books at the end of this season.  Get May out of the locker room now, play McCants (or not) in a backup position and save about $40k in these troubling financial times.

Chicago: Everybody knows they have too many guards in Chicago, and that Gordon is very likely going to walk at the end of this season.  So, might as well invest time in what you’re likely going to have to work with (Rose, Hinrich, Sefolosha, and Hughes), rent May’s giant body for the 2nd half of the season so you can have an extra big, and have a willing reserve in place in Willie Green to ride the bench while you develop the four more talented guys.  Admittedly, this is the least attractive aspect of the trade for any of the teams in this proposal, but Chicago can’t keep playing a five-player guard rotation for players who all think they deserve starters’ minutes.  Philadelphia probably could/should throw in its first-round draft pick here as well to sweeten the deal.  (UPDATE: I just read on TrueHoop that Larry Hughes wants to be traded.  This is actually perfect.  Why?  Because the Bulls need to showcase him to get some team to bite at a trade and take on his massive contract, and will have a plausible excuse to do so if BG is out of the picture).

Philadelphia: This is the no-brainer part of the equation.  You’re trading size for perimeter shooting, which I’m okay with - Brand trailing the break is a much better option than trying to keep up with it, and Dalembert, while a fine player, is not so invaluable that Philly couldn’t cope with playing a little small.  After this trade, the Sixers’ stable of bigs would feature the soon-to-return Elton Brand (sliding into the starting center position) backed up by a core of bigs consisting of Young, Speights, Evans, Marshall, and Ratliff.  Not a dream team, but not total chopped liver either; they could totally manage with that crew.  And then as far as perimeter shooting, Gordon and Mike Miller are obviously two of the players most capable of hitting the long-ball on teams that are very likely willing to part with them.

We have so much talent on the floor but we’re crippling it by asking our players to fill roles that they shouldn’t be asked to fill - keep Andre Miller at PG, start Gordon at the SG, move Iggy back to the SF (where he belongs), move Thad back to PF (he’s undersized but overquicked and did well here last year), and Brand at C (which would free him up to work inside and remove the obstacle that is the giant Dalembert).  That will give you a very strong bench of Mike Miller, Lou Williams, Maresse Speights, and Reggie Evans, for a much more solid 9-man rotation.  Just like Phoenix in its golden days had its “Seven-Starter” lineup (with Diaw and Barbosa the honorary “starters”), this too would be something like a seven-starter lineup, with Lou Williams filling out the PG/SG backup and Mike Miller playing backup SG/SF, with Speights and Evans coming in as backup bigs to Young and Brand.

As for long-term plans for Gordon and Mike Miller,  Gordon’s contract expires at the end of this year, which is fine, because Mike Miller and Lou Williams (along with passable 3rd-stringer Royal Ivey) would be there for the minutes if the 76ers didn’t want to give Gordon a new contract.  At the very least, Gordon would get to showcase with full starter minutes on a team that desperately needs 3-point shooting, improve a team to (hopefully) get it into the playoffs, and probably improves his chances of getting paid somewhere else in the process.

If Gordon demands a longer-term contract before agreeing to the trade, I’d give it to him - I bet he’d accept a lot less than he was asking the Bulls for.  He knows by now that he’s not going to get mega-millions for being an undersized 2 anyway.  We have five players coming off the books this year, and with Andre Miller potentially leaving town this offseason, we may have some money to give Gordon a bit of a two-three year contract and a raise and still attract a point-guard-of-the-future (or trade Mike Miller for a pretty good one).

And in regard to Mike Miller, if the 76ers keep him for the last year of his contract (and jettison Gordon), that would give  the 76ers time to continue to work him into the core of players, as he’s a solid starting option at the 2.

With all of the teams I mentioned floundering, this is a way for some teams to save some money, ship off unwanted players, clear logjams, and put players at their proper positions, all while adding talent that complements their existing rosters and giving every team a little more hope for the future…but especially mine.

I am not going to offer any sort of real election coverage, as that would be presumptuous and pointless.  What I am going to offer are quotes and enjoyable bits of copy that I read or hear today, and will link to the source, when possible.

Douglas Hannan, 44, a property manager who was selling baked goods on the line to benefit the school, said “I’ve been here ten years, this is the first time I’ve ever seen a line at all. Sales are going amazing.”

“The pullout was greatly exaggerated,” began Caroline Adelman, Georgia Communications Director, Obama for America.

The town of Hart’s Location reported 17 votes for Obama, 10 for McCain and two for write-in Ron Paul. Independent Ralph Nader was on both towns’ ballots but got no votes.

It would engender, in addition to political chaos; a) four years of very, very hard feelings in this country: b) a steep loss of prestige for the United States in world public opinion; c) the demise of the Electoral College.

My friends, it’s time to turn the page. You betcha, literally.

McCain: You know, I didn’t learn a great deal, Chris, that I didn’t already know.

Berman: Senator, let’s bring it into our arena for a moment.

Colorado is a feisty state — you never know which way it’s going to go.

In Philadelphia, lines were equally long and at one polling place on in the east side of the city several voting machines were not working because there was no extension cord available to help them reach the electrical outlet.

There were also reports of underhanded tactics. Several callers from Indiana, Pennsylvania, Virginia and Maryland reported receiving automated phone calls with incorrect polling locations. Dozens of people in Colorado and New Jersey reported not receiving confirmation of their voter registrations or absentee ballots.

 John McCain faces not so much of an uphill battle as a vertical ascent wearing two lead boots, one marked “Bush” and the other marked “Palin”.

Karl Rove, the man widely credited with engineering President Bush’s two successful White House bids, is predicting the Illinois senator will take the White House in an Electoral College landslide, winning 338 votes to John McCain’s 200.

Marian Goldberg said she was willing to “stay [there] as long as it takes.” Asked if her boss will be patient with her, she said, “I’m the boss. And I’m going to be patient.”

“Here in Alaska, where we’ve cleaned up the corruption and we’ve taken on some self-dealing and self-interests, we’ve been able to really put government back on the side of the people,” Palin told reporters after voting.

Soggy ballots.

The presidential candidate’s half-brother, Malik, tied a bull to a tree, then hobbled it, and asked me to hold the beast’s head to the ground as he drew a machete across its jugular….But for Malik, one lesson is already clear: Don’t buy a cow on the day your half-brother is expected to be elected President of the United States.

And be nice to the person who gives you an “I Voted” sticker. That person has been up since dawn defending your democracy against the forces of chaos.

When the two-term Republican President has a 20% approval rating and Americans prefer the Democrats’ solution to just about every national problem, Americans just aren’t going to elect another Republican President — especially when the Democratic nominee has raised the most money in the history of money.

“I have the time and luxury to do this,” he said of his four-hour ordeal to vote. “If this is a systemic thing, what does that mean for the country?”

Perhaps the most amusing report came from the suburban town of Brookhaven, in Delaware County, where Committee representatives heard complaints about snakes in the building, and structural problems including a collapsed ceiling and broken lights.

This story strikes me as lazy thinking and as non-news.  It’s an article in Time magazine that says that Obama is ice and McCain is fire; the Dem is dispassionate and clinical and the GOPher is an emotional volcano.

This just seems to be untrue, doesn’t it? Obama seems to very much understand and feel the pain of his fellow citizens, and his manner is of a cool and levelheaded mentor - like a teacher or camp counselor who cared very much about your problem but knew that it wouldn’t help for him to panic too.

And the idea that McCain is totally out of control of his emotions seems to be extremely implausible - you can’t have been in the Senate for more than a quarter century and not be able to keep your thoughts and feelings in check.  I have no doubt that his “irritability” or other cantankerous tendencies serve more as tools to dismiss Obama as a whippersnapper; I just can’t fathom that the man has been in public office this long and wouldn’t know exactly how his actions affect his public image.

This article seems to me to be just another stupid dialectic that some news outlet has decided to run with, because they want to make it a this-vs-that election, and because red-vs-blue is so 2004, they’ve decided on the elemental (and not very subtle) stand-in of fire vs ice.

Let’s check our collective common sense for a moment - does anybody actually believe that if there were some sort of terrorist threat that Obama wouldn’t react with passion and decisiveness? And does anybody actually believe that McCain is so impetuous that he’s going to declare war on Iran simply because somebody sneers at him funny?

I don’t mean to single out Time.  This bit of idiocy is a journalistic device that nearly all the outlets are using. There is a great Obama profile that I feel helps me understand him much better in New York Times Magazine, which shows a nuanced, energetic, interested, concerned, fallible, human candidate.  I’m sure one is out there about McCain (anybody know of one?), but most news organizations aren’t interested in running with that angle.

They’d rather he be a cocked gun, a red-hot poker, about to erupt at any moment and take any sense of subtlety or humanity with him.

“President Bush gave a speech today about the economy and he said that he believes that ‘anyone who makes bad decisions should fail.’ Then Bush looked around the room and said, ‘Hey, why did it get so quiet in here?’”

- Conan O’Brien

Although the punchline is made-up, I still think the real quote is pretty good example of irony.